This Thing Gone Healthy

Everything is propelled to me,
I attract, I do not pull.
So much that was dark,
So much that was heavy
Came to me, I remember
The wind changing, the poles shifting,
And there I was with a weight
Where none was before,
And a shadow over my remains.

I walked with fists clenched,
Teeth under tight lips,
A curtain over my heart.
I supplied myself opium
In doubt, in cynical thoughts,
I saw only black stars gleaming,
Coal for a fire, even that luster
Was too much, I took gray stars instead,
The rest I hid with clouds.

Now you’re back, brown eyes and all,
I missed that bag you carry yourself in,
Though I promise myself I will not hurt.
This morning I did not wake
With distaste, my lips were open
And I was breathing finally,
And all inside me was land, whole continents,
Something for me to stand on.
But still I’m keeping a little pond fresh,
A place for the dark waters
To reflect your old leaving back to me.